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Today I came across a short autobiographical blurb of a man whom I had once greatly admired. In reading it I was struck by the pridefulness of the statements describing the successfulness of this man’s ministry. The whole time I wanted to vomit because I could see myself in this man’s statements. It was as if I was reading my thoughts, the thoughts I might not write or say out-loud but that I would certainly think to myself on a day when God’s kindness in ministry had been especially evident. I could feel my repulsive pride next to the beautiful humility of Christ and thanks be to God, the Holy Spirit made my heart desire holiness today. Because of that I am posting a prayer which I found helpful today in acknowledging my pride before God. I hope someone else finds it helpful as well.

HUMILIATION

Sovereign Lord,

When clouds of darkness, atheism, and unbelief come to me,

I see thy purpose of love

in withdrawing the Spirit that I might prize him more,

in chastening me for my confidence in past successes, that my wound of secret godlessness might be cured.

Help me to humble myself before thee

by seeing the vanity of honour

as a conceit of men’s minds,

as standing between me and thee;

by seeing that thy will must alone be done,

as much in denying as in giving spiritual enjoyments;

by seeing that my heart is nothing but evil,

mind, mouth, life void of thee;

by seeing that sin and Satan are allowed power in me

that I might know my sin,

be humbled

and gain strength thereby;

by seeing that unbelief shuts thee from me,

so that I sense not they majesty, power, mercy, or love.

Then possess me, for thou only art good and worthy.

Thou does not play in convincing me of sin,

Satan did not play in tempting me to it,

I do not play when I sink in deep mire,

for sin is no game, no toy, no bauble;

Let me never forget that the heinousness of sin lies

not so much in the nature of the sin committed,

as in the greatness of the Person sinned against.

When I am afraid of evils to come, comfort me,

by showing me

that in myself I am a dying, condemned wretch,

but that in Christ I am reconciled, made alive, and satisfied;

that I am feeble and unable to do any good,

but that in him I can do all things;

that what I now have in Christ is mine in part,

but shortly I shall have it perfectly in heaven.

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